My Sister Jen

My Sister Jen is an amazing and unique individual who refused to just drift down the river of life but paddled to both sides along her journey, exploring every tree and inlet, every curious creature and object. She would collect what she liked or found interesting and place it in her canoe. Most of what she collected along the way was people! People. This is what she valued most. This is where she spent her time and energy. This is where her treasure was. And most of these people became her friends as they discovered her authenticity, kind nature, depth of thought, artistic creativity, drive to fulfil her purpose, love of children, dedication to community, and a deep desire to help others grow and become the best versions of themselves. This is apparent in her theme song she wrote as it’s all about reaching your potential by recognizing your strengths and acting on these to make a difference in your own life and in the lives of others. And this she did! Jen understood we can’t reach our dreams working alone so she spent a lifetime forging relationships that were mutually nurturing and supportive. It was her own TEAM that was dedicated to cheering each other on in words and deeds.

This TEAM she collected along her journey became undeniable when she went through both trials and success. Success in celebrating with her in bringing the community together at numerous events over the years or people helping her at numerous trade shows everywhere she traveled and in trial as we saw the enormous support she had when going through extensive chemotherapy treatments and more recently the outpouring of love and concern in her latest trial as she went into hospice. Friends from across the country and even globe came far and wide to express their love, give service, support the family, and share the burden with Jen as far as humanly possible. The experience has been more than words can tell. The outpouring of love that has been manifest has brought Jen’s friend circle and her family’s together in ways unimaginable.

Through all the hardship, pain and uncertainty, Jen maintained the utmost optimism and strength. Her battle with cancer lasted over 4 years and even though the cancer had spread over those years she kept positive, set goals, and pushed her dreams forward with no diminishing pace. She pushed through even when feeling tired and sick. Her “why” sustained her when her body would not. She had a dream, and she was determined to make it happen. And, during these last few weeks as she lie in hospice she realized she had attained her dreams. She had brought people together. She had loyal friends. She had helped others feel loved and she was the recipient of love immeasurable. She made her oldest brother Lou cry (one of her lifelong goals)! She had brought community back. She had inspired countless children both within her family (her many nieces and nephews) and without. She had tried different career options. She had discovered her true passion and calling. She had overcome the anxiety and fear of branching out on her own. She showed us all what a determined soul could achieve. She wrote her book. She wrote her song. Her song was recorded! She bought her own house. She had overcome much of her childhood trauma. She had overcome illness by not letting it rob her of the time she did have. She had overcome any bitterness and regret. She accepted her condition without anger

towards God or man. She pointed no fingers. She was concerned for the wellbeing of others when she was gone. She recognized her impact on others would never be forgotten and that dying at a younger age may even have more influence for good. All this and more is a life well lived.

She is and was a fighter all the way, still making plans even while in hospice care. The reality of her situation finally set in as she realized she wasn’t getting any better but in decline. She resigned to this new reality and continued to use her time in strengthening the relationships she had cultivated over a lifetime. During her 4 weeks now in the hospital or hospice she has had time to enjoy her family and friends gathering around her bed for singing and stories and laughter, as well as sharing sadness and tears. She has also taken advantage of being the boss and allowing family and friends to dote over her as best as any knew how.

She is now going to a place we have not yet been, but are all going. There she will be better able to serve all she loves, free from the burdens of illness and mortality. There she will better be able to prepare a place for each of us as we travel to the other side someday. My hope is she will be among the first I see.

Jennifer Utsch of Tucson Arizona passed February 19, 2025.

Jeff Utsch, also of Tucson Arizona, is her brother and author.